20 years and Counting

20 Years and Counting

This past spring Kelly (my wife) and I celebrated our 20th wedding anniversary.  People have asked us, "What's the key to the marriage?"  "Do you have any tips?"  "Did you always know that you were meant for each other?"

Did you always know that you were meant for each other?  That's a great question. As I look back, I do remember the actual date that I KNEW we'd be together forever. 

On March 3^rd, 1994 my Dad died from lung cancer.  Of course, he had smoked since he was seven and apparently his parents weren’t exactly the hands-on type.  I mean you think they would have clued in when their little tike wanted an ashtray for his birthday or wanted more information about a nicotine patch.

Anyway, the weekend after Dad was buried my mom found out that Alan (Dad’s brother) was coming down to pay his last respects at the grave.  Mom wanted everything to be perfect. She told Kelly and me that the grave next to Dad’s had beautiful brown and yellow flowers and that we were in charge of putting flowers on Dad’s grave.  We didn’t realize that mom meant for us to buy similar flowers.  We honestly thought she wanted us to steal them off the “neighbor’s” grave. 

The next morning Kelly and I headed over to Sharon Memorial and we instantly saw the flowers.  However, the place was packed with people.  This meant we had to steal the bouquet subtlety. Since Kelly and I had only been married for 11 months I figured she’d want to leave.  Instead she whispered, “Kneel down and act like you’re mourning for this guy; when the coast is clear rip out the arrangement.” 

I knelt down and pretended to grieve uncontrollably for at least 10 minutes; finally Kelly said, “The coast is clear; do it.”  I grabbed the stems and pulled as hard as I could.  The flowers wouldn’t come out of the vase.  I was panicking and starting to sweat.  I whispered to Kelly, “I think he’s holding them.”  We both started laughing.  As I stood up ready to leave my sweet innocent bride looked at me with stone cold eyes and said, “Let me try.”  After a minute of yanking at the grave site bundle and swearing softly under her breath, Kelly noticed a chain holding the flowers in place.  She undid the chain and shoved the flowers into Dad’s grave.  Mission accomplished.

Unfortunately we never put the flowers back on the neighbor’s grave and one day Mom got a call.  It was the neighbor’s wife.  She screamed, “Did you steal the flowers off my husband’s grave?”  Mom just hung up the phone and till this day we pretend that phone call never happened.

I knew at that moment Kelly wasn't easily embarrassed, she was willing to take a risk, and she was seriously funny and I'll take that any day over sugar, spice, and everything nice!